Prompt
Essay – Technology and social contact
Some people believe that modern communication technology is making people less socially active, while others think it helps people to build stronger relationships. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Band 9 sample answer
Band 9 sample answer
Sentence-by-sentence analysis
Anatomy of a Band 9 Essay
Read the model answer normally, or switch on the examiner breakdown to see how each sentence contributes to the response.
Analysed against the four IELTS Writing assessment criteria. Each note explains how this specific sentence supports the essay.
Paragraph 1: Introduction — frames both views and gives a qualified position
Modern communication technology has transformed how people interact. Some argue it is reducing real-world social activity, whereas others believe it strengthens relationships by making contact easier. Both views have merit, although I think technology generally deepens relationships when used deliberately, despite some clear risks.
A concise paraphrase establishes the topic without copying the question. “Transformed how people interact” is broad enough to introduce both social activity and relationship quality.
The contrast is built into one controlled sentence using “whereas”, so both required views are introduced symmetrically before the writer gives a judgement.
This answers the opinion requirement immediately. The position is nuanced but unmistakable: the benefits predominate when technology is used deliberately.
Paragraph 2: Body 1 — explains how technology can reduce real-world social activity
On the one hand, social apps and messaging can replace face-to-face encounters with low-effort contact. People may spend evenings scrolling or replying to short texts instead of meeting friends, and even when they do meet, phones can fragment attention. In addition, online interaction often encourages “broadcasting” rather than genuine conversation, which can create a misleading sense of connection while leaving individuals socially isolated.
The topic sentence directly develops the first view by identifying a specific mechanism: convenient digital contact can displace higher-quality face-to-face interaction.
The coordinated structure develops two related consequences accurately: technology can prevent meetings altogether or weaken attention during meetings that still occur.
“Broadcasting rather than genuine conversation” precisely distinguishes public, low-reciprocity activity from meaningful interaction, while “misleading sense of connection” sharpens the paragraph’s argument.
Paragraph 3: Body 2 — explains how technology can strengthen relationships
On the other hand, these tools can meaningfully enhance relationships by removing barriers of distance and time. Video calls allow families to remain emotionally close across countries, and group chats help friends coordinate plans and share everyday moments. Technology can also support shy or busy people by providing gradual, low-pressure ways to maintain ties, and it enables communities to form around shared interests, which can lead to lasting offline friendships.
The mirrored transition clearly signals the second required view, while the sentence gives the paragraph a controlling idea: digital communication removes practical barriers.
Two concrete examples develop different kinds of relational benefit: sustaining emotional closeness over distance and maintaining ordinary day-to-day involvement.
The sentence extends the argument beyond distance. Its layered structure links accessibility, shared-interest communities and eventual offline friendship without losing grammatical control.
Paragraph 4: Conclusion — identifies usage habits as the deciding factor and confirms the judgement
In my view, the key variable is not the technology itself but the habits it promotes. If people use digital communication to initiate plans, sustain long-distance bonds, and exchange thoughtful messages, relationships can become stronger. However, when it becomes a substitute for in-person contact and focused listening, social life is likely to shrink. Overall, technology is more a tool than a threat, and conscious use determines its social impact.
The conclusion returns to the essay’s qualification and identifies the precise boundary of the writer’s position rather than merely repeating that technology has pros and cons.
The conditional structure explains exactly when the writer’s positive judgement holds, while the three parallel verbs make the conditions concrete and easy to follow.
“However” introduces the necessary counter-condition, creating a clear logical contrast with the preceding sentence and preserving the essay’s qualified position.
The final judgement resolves the discussion decisively: technology itself is not presented as inherently harmful; outcomes depend principally on how people use it.
Verified word count: 253
Analysis by IELTS Master editorial review. How this analysis is created and reviewed
Useful vocabulary and phrases
low-effort contact
Shows precise evaluation of online interaction quality.
Quick reactions and short texts can become low-effort contact that replaces deeper conversation.
fragment attention
Natural collocation that demonstrates sophisticated control.
Phones can fragment attention during meals and conversations.
a misleading sense of connection
Expresses nuance and critical thinking.
Constant updates can give a misleading sense of connection.
remove barriers of distance and time
Directly supports the pro-technology argument.
Video calls remove barriers of distance and time for relatives abroad.
the key variable
Helps present a clear evaluative stance.
The key variable is how intentionally people use these platforms.
a substitute for
Fits the ‘replacement’ logic central to the prompt.
When messaging becomes a substitute for meeting in person, bonds can weaken.
Common mistakes to avoid
- Discussing only one side and forgetting to ‘discuss both views’.
- Giving an opinion without clear reasons or examples.
- Using overly general statements (e.g., ‘technology is bad’) instead of explaining specific effects such as distraction or enabling long-distance intimacy.
- Writing a conclusion that introduces new arguments instead of summarising your position.
- Overusing informal language (e.g., ‘stuff’, ‘kids these days’) in an academic essay.
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